Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
