Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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