i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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