im drinking this country out of the recession.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
