So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
