I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
