Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
