I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I am available for nakedness
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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