Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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