Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
