google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
