Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
