Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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