i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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