And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I did not marry a roomba.
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