so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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