If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
