it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
