Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
