32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I think people are normalizing furries
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
