I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
