my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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