i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
