Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
