I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize