my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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