Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize