I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
