The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
me + whiskey = a bad person
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
