And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
