the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize