Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
