god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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