I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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