went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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