bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
