Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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