Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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