This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
