just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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