i don't like sucking hair
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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