JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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