is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
