so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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