jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
