I want to walk on stilts...naked
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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