So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
