I wish you could order shots online.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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