Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
