i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
