Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
