Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
