my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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