I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
