is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize