We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
why is half of my head shaved?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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